My Pants Out of France

"Question: Can they put you away for treason if you’re not that hot and horny for your home country? Is not being hot and horny for your home country considered a crime? Even if your home country is Canada? (Especially if you’re home country is Canada?) I have nothing against Canada, really, but – sorry – it is Canada. As in, it’s not one of those sexy countries that come from some sexy somewhere else. As in – sorry – Canada is not that sexy. (And get your minds out of the gutter about all the kinky shit you can do with maple syrup.) I blame Celine Dion. (Ha! That line about kinky maple syrup and then the one right after about Celine Dion? Was totally trying to gross you out!)..."